


Mild Intoxication

by TheRogueHuntress



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Cinnamon Roll Newt Scamander, Drunken Shenanigans, Humor, Jacob Kowalski is a sweetheart, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-18
Updated: 2018-05-18
Packaged: 2019-05-08 17:46:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14699211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRogueHuntress/pseuds/TheRogueHuntress
Summary: Jacob beamed. "I am on the floor," he agreed, quite cheerfully.





	Mild Intoxication

"Upsy daisy," Newt murmured. "Up you get now."

Jacob was lying on the floor of The Three Broomsticks.

He did not look like he was planning on getting up soon.

"Newt! You are so tall!" Jacob slurred.

Newt shuffled awkwardly, very aware of the attention they were attracting. "Yes, er, that is true. A fact probably exacerbated by the fact that you're on the floor."

Jacob beamed. "I am on the floor," he agreed, quite cheerfully.

"Oh Merlin," Newt said, and ran a hand through his hair. He glanced about. Most other patrons of the bar were watching them with amusement, but the odd few looked annoyed by the disruption to their night.

"You're a wizard!" Jacob exclaimed. "So am I!"

From his coat he withdrew the fake wand that Newt had transfigured for him. Newt immediately snatched it out of his hand.

Jacob frowned. "Wand stealer," he grumbled. For some reason, however, it made him stagger to his feet. Newt breathed a sigh of relief.

"Newt, Newt, did you steal my wand?" Jacob patted himself down, as if checking for it.

Newt wrapped an arm around Jacob in order to keep him upright, and made for the door.

"As a matter of fact, I did," he answered, distracted by trying to negotiate tables, chairs, and the odd broomstick.

"Does that mean I'm no longer a wizard?" Jacob whispered.

They'd arrived at the door. A few tables away there sat wizard ironically clapping their arrival, a smirk upon his face.

"Oh, sod off," Newt muttered under his breath.

Jacob seemed to deflate in his arms.

"Not you!" Newt hastened to correct himself, and Jacob was beaming once more.

Newt fumbled open the door, and finally they left the pub. Jacob was still stumbling, but he could walk on his own, just about.

"I am, maybe, a little bit drunk," Jacob said, and then hiccuped a laugh.

"Really," Newt said dryly. He tucked Jacob's 'wand' back into his pocket - a precaution, should any wizard try to take offense that Jacob was a Muggle.

Jacob clapped him on the shoulder in thanks. "You are the best, Newt. You know that? The best. Favourite. My favourite. And any day spent with you is my favorite day. So today is my new favorite day."

Newt smiled despite himself. "You're my favourite too, Jacob."

Jacob nodded decisively. "Good. That's why we work. Being each other's favourites." He hiccuped again. "Home? Let's go."

He marched off. Newt wondered how long it would take him to realise it was the wrong direction, but decided not to test it.

"This way," he called. Jacob spun on one foot, and marched back, unrepentant.

"You see - this is why I have you," Jacob said. Newt extended a hand, and clasped their fingers together.

They began to walk toward out of the town, toward the Apparition point.

"You have me," Newt echoed, and smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on Fan Fiction: [The Lady Rogue](https://www.fanfiction.net/~theladyrogue) or tumblr: [TheRogueHuntress](https://theroguehuntress.tumblr.com/) if you wanna chat, or feel free to comment!


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